First of all, food; the private, the personal economic worry.Am Isafe for food? Then sex, and until one is tranquil and not ashamed, not irritated and dissatisfied, how can one care for other people, or for next year or the Order of the World? How can one, Benham?"He seized the illustration at hand."Here we are in Warsaw--not a month after bomb-throwing and Cossack charging.Windows have still to be mended, smashed doors restored.There's blood-stains still on some of the houses.There are hundreds of people in the Citadel and in the Ochrana prison.This morning there were executions.Is it anything more than an eddy in the real life of the place? Watch the customers in the shops, the crowd in the streets, the men in the cafes who stare at the passing women.They are all swallowed up again in their own business.They just looked up as the Cossacks galloped past; they just shifted a bit when the bullets spat...."And when the streets of Moscow were agog with the grotesque amazing adventure of the Potemkin mutineers, Prothero was in the full tide of the private romance that severed him from Benham and sent him back to Cambridge--changed.
Before they reached Moscow Benham was already becoming accustomed to disregard Prothero.He was looking over him at the vast heaving trouble of Russia, which now was like a sea that tumbles under the hurrying darknesses of an approaching storm.In those days it looked as though it must be an overwhelming storm.He was drinking in the wide and massive Russian effects, the drifting crowds in the entangling streets, the houses with their strange lettering in black and gold, the innumerable barbaric churches, the wildly driven droshkys, the sombre red fortress of the Kremlin, with its bulbous churches clustering up into the sky, the crosses, the innumerable gold crosses, the mad church of St.Basil, carrying the Russian note beyond the pitch of permissible caricature, and in this setting the obscure drama of clustering, staring, sash-wearing peasants, long-haired students, sane-eyed women, a thousand varieties of uniform, a running and galloping to and fro of messengers, a flutter of little papers, whispers, shouts, shots, a drama elusive and portentous, a gathering of forces, an accumulation of tension going on to a perpetual clash and clamour of bells.Benham had brought letters of introduction to a variety of people, some had vanished, it seemed.
They were "away," the porters said, and they continued to be "away,"--it was the formula, he learnt, for arrest; others were evasive, a few showed themselves extraordinarily anxious to inform him about things, to explain themselves and things about them exhaustively.One young student took him to various meetings and showed him in great detail the scene of the recent murder of the Grand Duke Sergius.The buildings opposite the old French cannons were still under repair."The assassin stood just here.The bomb fell there, look! right down there towards the gate; that was where they found his arm.He was torn to fragments.He was scraped up.
He was mixed with the horses...."
Every one who talked spoke of the outbreak of revolution as a matter of days or at the utmost weeks.And whatever question Benham chose to ask these talkers were prepared to answer.Except one."And after the revolution," he asked, "what then?..." Then they waved their hands, and failed to convey meanings by reassuring gestures.
He was absorbed in his effort to understand this universal ominous drift towards a conflict.He was trying to piece together a process, if it was one and the same process, which involved riots in Lodz, fighting at Libau, wild disorder at Odessa, remote colossal battlings in Manchuria, the obscure movements of a disastrous fleet lost somewhere now in the Indian seas, steaming clumsily to its fate, he was trying to rationalize it all in his mind, to comprehend its direction.He was struggling strenuously with the obscurities of the language in which these things were being discussed about him, a most difficult language demanding new sets of visual images because of its strange alphabet.Is it any wonder that for a time he failed to observe that Prothero was involved in some entirely disconnected affair.
They were staying at the big Cosmopolis bazaar in the Theatre Square.Thither, through the doors that are opened by distraught-looking men with peacocks' feathers round their caps, came Benham's friends and guides to take him out and show him this and that.At first Prothero always accompanied Benham on these expeditions; then he began to make excuses.He would stay behind in the hotel.Then when Benham returned Prothero would have disappeared.When the porter was questioned about Prothero his nescience was profound.
One night no Prothero was discoverable at any hour, and Benham, who wanted to discuss a project for going on to Kieff and Odessa, was alarmed.
"Moscow is a late place," said Benham's student friend."You need not be anxious until after four or five in the morning.It will be quite time--QUITE time to be anxious to-morrow.He may be--close at hand."When Benham hunted up Prothero in his room next morning he found him sleepy and irritable.
"I don't trouble if YOU are late," said Prothero, sitting up in his bed with a red resentful face and crumpled hair."I wasn't born yesterday.""I wanted to talk about leaving Moscow."
"I don't want to leave Moscow."
"But Odessa--Odessa is the centre of interest just now.""I want to stay in Moscow."
Benham looked baffled.
Prothero stuck up his knees and rested his night-shirted arms upon them."I don't want to leave Moscow," he said, "and I'm not going to do so.""But haven't we done--"
Prothero interrupted."You may.But I haven't.We're not after the same things.Things that interest you, Benham, don't interest me.I've found--different things."His expression was extraordinarily defiant.
"I want," he went on, "to put our affairs on a different footing.
